Back to Waiting

I got really, really sick the last week the girls were with us. The day that the girls were to leave, I got a phone call from our caseworker about a toddler and a newborn baby that needed a place to stay. The baby had been exposed to drugs in utero and was going through withdrawals. I would have needed to be up all night with him. My caseworker heard my voice on the phone and knew how sick I was and that I wouldn't be able to stay up all night with the baby, so she said "no" for me. :)
I decided to quit my part-time teaching job. Of the three weeks that the girls were with us, I had only taught for one week. I had taken a week off to be with the girls and take them to their appointments and court. Then I took a week off when I got terribly sick. I didn't see how I could balance foster parenting and teaching. It was a bit of a risk, though, because I didn't know when we'd be receiving another placement (or if our girls would be coming back to us - still hoping), so I was facing an unknown future full of unstructured days.
We had decided to take 2-3 weeks off of foster parenting to recover. We let our caseworker know that she could call us about other placements after that. I had been sleeping about four hours a night while the girls were with us, our house was a mess, and we were still mourning. We learned a lot about how unprepared we were to be parents. I had done so much research on foster care, grief and trauma, PTSD, etc. but I had neglected to research discipline, bedtime, healthy snacks, etc. We also really didn't have very many toys or kids' activities.
About a week later, we got a phone call asking if we would take two young boys. We were still mourning and recovering.We decided we weren't ready yet and we said "no."
We got another phone call for three boys. Dave and I had been so overwhelmed by two kids and felt that we could only handle two - one for each of us. We decided to stick with two kids, so we said no.
We called the girls often. We were so happy that they were doing well with their relatives. B was asked to testify in court a couple of times and it was very distressing. I'm so glad that she was with Melissa to get the support she needed. They were able to see their grandparents and cousins often. B started going to the elementary school where Melissa taught and two of her cousins went, so she was with her family all of the time. Every time we talked, it was clear that they were very happy living with their relatives. They were safe and being cared for.
One day I got a phone call from Melissa asking me if I could take T out of daycare and take care of her. She was sick and couldn't stay in daycare, and Melissa was at work. I jumped at the opportunity and loved playing with the sweet little girl I missed so much. When I met Melissa to drop off T, we chatted for awhile and got to know each other.
A few weeks later it was B's birthday. We bought her some gifts and Melissa dropped off both of the girls for a morning so that we could hang out together. We dressed up and made movies. T kept hugging me so tight. I knew she was glad to see me again. I just wanted to burst into tears, I was so happy having the girls back, even if for a little while.
I babysat T another day when Melissa and B went to court and then went shopping together afterward. Melissa told me some things that she had found out from B about her birth mother. Melissa's family had not been told why the girls had been removed from the home and now she was hearing about it and was shocked. She said that she and her husband had taken the girls in with the intent of them going back to their birth mother. Now they didn't want that. They also had never intended to adopt the girls if they couldn't return to their birth mother. As I listened to Melissa tell me all of this, I was not surprised at all. It was exactly what I had hoped and prayed for and truly felt was going to happen. God had been reassuring me all along. Melissa was very aware how much we loved the girls and wanted to adopt them. She told me that it was an incredibly difficult decision, but that she felt that our home was the best place for the girls to be. I am so grateful to Melissa and her family for trusting us and choosing us to take the girls. I can't imagine being in her position. To say we were overjoyed at this news would be a massive understatement. On Christmas Eve, we were able to tell our families about our Christmas Miracle - the girls would be returning to us in January!